1. Styling your hair and putting on makeup makes you feel fancy, and like you accomplished something great.
2. Eating lunch directly out of the refrigerator is quick, easy, and saves on dishes.
3. Making coffee in the morning comes first, before brushing your teeth, getting dressed, or peeing.
4. Going out in public with spit up on your shirt warrants no more than a shrug. Mama’s accessorizing, yo.
5. Stores/malls are ranked in preference according to: accessibility to a change station, stroller-friendly aisles, and nice-ness of places to nurse. Bonus points if the nursing room has recliners and/or a TV.
6. Though gas is expensive, it might just be worth draining the tank if driving in circles will guarantee that baby stays asleep.
7. Boogers, poop, drool and spit up are just an every day part of life. Discussing these things is also completely normal.
8. When the TV is your kid’s only accepted form of white noise during naps, you watch a whole lot of crap. Some good shows…but mostly crap.
9. When choosing just one load of laundry to get done, the odds are you shrug, decide to wear your yoga pants another day, and toss in a load of sleepers and onesies.
10. After a long day of church, errands and dinner with the family, you notice something bunched up in your jeans. And, because you’re just so classy, yesterday’s underwear falls out of your pant leg. You’re stylin’, lady.
How have you waved your new mom flag lately?